Disclaimer: The Technishit is purely satirical, don’t take it too seriously.
Tuition, parking, food, WebAssign and Maple costs — it is no wonder why students are struggling financially. One NC State student has found a particular avenue for saving money by skipping out on housing costs and living at D.H Hill Library full time.
William Pilgrim, a freshman studying mechanical engineering, has been secretly living at D.H Hill for the last three months until he was recently discovered by security officer Ed Dabney on Monday.
“I had seen him [Pilgrim] around a lot while on shift, but I didn’t think anything of it,” Dabney said. “A lot of kids end up in the library for a few days in a row. It wasn’t until I found him cooking burgers on the fifth floor that I realized what he was doing.”
Dabney said he found Pilgrim while investigating reports of the smell of food throughout the book stacks. Pilgrim was situated in a supply closet with a mini George Foreman grill and, upon being caught, offered a burger.
“What else was I supposed to do?” Pilgrim said when asked about the incident. “I guess the burgers were a step too far, but I wanted to celebrate the semester ending in style. My friends were out getting the buns when I got caught.”
Pilgrim said his life at the library was surprisingly comfortable. The frugal student utilized D.H Hill’s variety of chairs for bedding, sleeping in a different part of the library each night. Pilgrim would wash his clothes at friend’s apartments, brush his teeth in the bathrooms and shower periodically at Carmichael Gymnasium.
“It wasn’t great, but it saved me from having to pay over $600 a month in housing costs,” Pilgrim said. “I considered buying a parking pass and living in my car as well. Maybe now that I’m caught, I’ll just do that.”
Pilgrim said that he never lived in one specific area in the library in order to avoid suspicion. Pilgrim stayed in group study rooms, bathrooms, the reading room, the pod chairs and, lastly, the fifth floor of the books stacks. The fifth floor acted as a sweet spot, avoiding traffic from people who assumed the higher floors were empty when they weren’t, and the lower floors filled by lazier students, according to Pilgrim.
“I’d recommend this life to anyone,” Pilgrim said. “You’re close to classes, Hillsborough and the power doesn’t go out nearly as much as somewhere like Avent Ferry. What more do you need?”
University Police has not charged Pilgrim at this time, as it seems there is not currently a specific rule against a student living in D.H Hill. They have issued Pilgrim an order to not resume living in the library after winter break, but no further actions have been taken.
“NC State Student Legal Services says I might be able obtain squatters rights if I stay at [D.H] Hill for my full four years, but I figure I shouldn’t press my luck.” Pilgrim said. “I just hope I’m not the reason freshmen have to stay in University Housing next year.”
