Senators Fixing Leaks? No.

Ahoy Mateys!

Every now and then, as ye all know, a leak will spring up in ye ship, and tha first thing ye do is grab tha tar and patch it like thar bae no tomorrow. Some mateys look at tha Student Senate’s image just like tha sink’n boat, tha only difference is thar bae no one patch’n tha holes. Now lots o’ mateys like ta insult tha Student Senate as a whole, but takes it from mae there bae a small faction (a word I done learned in college!) that bae try’n their best ta do what they done believe bae tha best for tha students. Tha larger lot o’ these senators’ efforts nay bae worth their salt.

Me case and point. We’ve done had two very successful call ins ta try ta stop federal student aid from bae’n cut, tha first time we had about 15 mateys from Senate show up, tha second 9 out o’ 67. Now this past weekend at tha battle o’ Tha Wolfpack vs. Maryland t’was tha day for Student Government ta go collect cans and money for tha Big Four/ACC Canned Food Challenge at tha RBC center. Swabby and I (who nay even bae a student at tha port) decided ta join our merry lot o’ senators that signed up ta go collect cans. Much ta our chagrin Swabby and I t’were tha only mateys out there save tha lass man’n tha table. That bae correct, ZERO o’ tha senators showed up.

Many a lad and lass likes ta ask “what has Student Government done for me?” And I’ll bae tha first ta tell ye there bae some dedicated people who takes their time ta advocate for ye, ta see that ye best interest bae heard by tha administration, tha faculty and tha staff at this here port. But when it comes right down ta goin’ out and doing something tangable, mayhaps their time just bae too valuable, mayhaps they bae too important, mayhaps they done forgot or just bae too lazy. Zero scrogs showed from tha Senate an hour early ta helps collect cans and money with us, but nay fret, they did make it on time ta tha game ta cheer on tha Wolfpack.

The Pirate CaptainStudent Body President