Disclaimer: The Ivory Belltower is purely satirical. Don’t take it too seriously.
Monday, several student organizations collectively held a meeting to discuss the controversial Halloween costume party that took place in nearby apartments on Saturday evening. Campus police were present at the meeting. Tensions were high after several photos surfaced on social media outlets Sunday morning. Hundreds of students filled the auditorium at Witherspoon Student Center to discuss the anger and discomfort brought upon a large portion of the student body as a result of the party.
The party was called “Trailer Park Heaven” and was intended to be a response to the recent “CMT v BET” party held by NC State students at The Retreat At Raleigh. As expected, many African-American students were outraged and disgusted by the “CMT v BET” theme, especially with the event following so closely behind NC State’s Diversity Week — shockingly, they were not alone.
Several other minority groups were disgusted by this act and decided that it was time to give white students a taste of their own medicine. The “Trailer Park Heaven” themed party was a jab at the portion of the student body who haven’t quite wrapped their heads around the concept of “It’s a culture. Not a costume.”
Invitations to the party read, “It is clear that efforts to educate our white student body on the importance of cultural sensitivity have proven to be futile. The continued choice of those students to ridicule and mock our cultures has left us no choice. This year, we will be hosting the very first ‘Trailer Park Heaven’ party. On the menu will be bland, boiled, unseasoned chicken. Don’t worry about pre-gaming. We’ll have plenty of drinks and tons of drugs. Oh, and don’t worry about the party being shut down — they don’t do that at white parties.”
Several students filled the apartment donning a variety of “costumes.” One student dressed as a box of Saltine crackers, with a label that read “no salt added.” Another student dressed as a Duke’s mayonnaise jar. Other costumes included serial killers, hillbillies, soccer moms addicted to prescription pills and an assortment of other flavorless food items.
When one gentleman dressed in a blood-stained white t-shirt was asked what he was dressed as, he responded by saying, “I’m a white serial killer. But it’s okay, I’ll just claim insanity.”
One female student spent the entire evening intentionally dancing offbeat to the music, saying that she had no rhythm. A couple spent the evening publicly displaying their affection for one another while wearing signs that read “Cousins.”
In Monday’s meeting, white students argued that the party was racist and those involved deserved to be reprimanded by the university. They stated that the event was offensive because it reinforced many of the negative stereotypes associated with being white in America.
Becky Warbucks, a sophomore studying sociology with a concentration in white people said, “This party is totally not okay. I use salt every time I cook, and I know how to ‘whip’ and ‘nae-nae.’”
White attendees nodded in unison and mumbled all the other popular dances that they knew.
One student was so upset by the party that she was moved to tears. As her friend held her hand, she stated in front of the packed room, “I just don’t understand why these students would do this to us. We have shown them nothing but kindness. When we wear geisha costumes, or dress up as sexy Indians for Halloween, it’s because we love your culture. For one day, we want to know what it feels like to be you.”
Cleopatra Brown, an African-American student majoring in accounting, responded to the student by saying, “That’s the problem. You think that because you dress up like us for a day, you know what it feels like to be us. You’ll never know what it feels like to feel unprotected by the police. Or how it feels to be discriminated against for jobs because of your skin color.”
The students quickly hushed Brown, saying that she didn’t know what she was talking about.
The only thing shocking about today’s meeting was how quickly it was organized. Chancellor Woodson, Mayor Nancy McFarlane and Gov. Pat McCrory were all in attendance and agreed that the kind of behavior displayed at the party would not be tolerated. They comforted the white student body and ensured them that they would work hard to make sure that this kind of thing never happened again.
